Jonahisms

So for a while now I've been meaning to keep track of the funny things Jonah says. Of course they aren't nearly as funny without his voice and pronunciations...but oh well. Here's some classics-

(in car while I'm driving)
jonah: "Mom, you're an idiot"
me: "if you say that again you're going to get a spank in the mouth"
jonah: "no I'm not, you're too far away"

"Where does God live?"
"Where does Jesus work?"

"I don't like Solomon, I want him to go back in your tummy"
"Solomon, stop smiling at me!"

(dog is barking incessantly)
jonah: "job you stop barking or else you're going on time out. 1..2...3 okay you're going on time out" (then he pulls him into my bedroom and closes the door.)

gram carol: "jonah if you continue I'm going to have to call your mommy"
jonah: "you call my mommy right now!" (in angry, so what? tone)

"Don't be scared, Jesus is watching over you"

"Mommy and Daddy is the boss, I'm a child"

"I'm so frustrated!" (i hear this one daily)

"no I didn't pee in my pants, I just dribbled" (with soaked shorts)

"gram allison is my best buddy in the whole world"

(just woke up, first words out of his mouth) "I want to wear my tiger suit today"

(after I'm done working he usually says) "how was your work Mom?"
(as my clients leave he sometimes says) "thanks for coming here!"

"Daddy is a man, I'm a big boy"

(at store)
cashier: "hi! what's you're name?"
jonah: "Jonah Adam Squarepants"

"hmmm...how about...." (his answer to any suggestion he doesn't like..fill in the end of statement with his idea)

I'm sure I'll think of more sometime... he is hilarious and precious. I wonder what he'll say tomorrow...